The New Move

So it's been a while since I have posted anything, but things have been a little crazy.  We have been looking for a house here and there and one came on market that we loved and we bought it!  So we moved in on June 17th and have been trying to get unpacked and moved in along with every day life.  We are pretty much unpacked but I am not a decorator, so NOTHING is decorated yet.  We'll get to it eventually!  Rick, Lori, Cody and Tessa came and helped get the big stuff and that helped more than they will ever know! We really have the best family, that will do anything to help us out, they are amazing!

With the new house comes adjustment!  I feel like we have adjusted pretty well and Dylan hasn't been all that bad except for one little area:

In the first week at least 3 days I had to clean these types of messes up.  They were done literally within 5 minutes of him not being watched!  My other two kids wanted to make friends and we had met some of the "friends" so I kind of sent them to their house to see if they wanted to play.  They ended up playing with the Slip and Slide, at a house that I had not even officially met the Mom, (she had dropped cinnamon rolls off one morning along with her phone number so we had sent texts to each other) so I probably looked like a bad Mother!  She text me a picture and said the kids were having a blast!  I told her I was sorry I couldn't come introduce myself because Desi was sleeping and I was watching Dylan like a hawk!  I have explained to the neighbors we have met that Dylan has Autism because I feel if they know and see him out wandering they will be more aware and let us know rather than just assume a kid is out there playing.

Brandon and I feel like this past week has been his absolute worst.  We don't know if it is the move and that we are just busy so it seems bad, or if he is in fact bad.  You literally have to be by his side at all times or you get to clean up a not so fun mess.  He is all over the place and is finding his new things he wants to do like: Throwing rocks or garbage down the window wells, Going out one door and making his way to the other door, Lifting up a piece of carpet that he found wasn't stapled down all the way, Getting into the Fridge and Pantry constantly.  He has also gotten obsessed with the binki again and if he notices Desi with it, he pretty much tracks her down as if she is his prey.  I kind of laugh at this because he is sneaky about it and waits until the exact right time to swoop in and steal it from her.  At least, he is not to physical with her and does not harm her but sometimes he has a look in his eye like he just wants to squeeze her.

We are having a fence put in but it can't be done until the end of July.  Once that is in then things should calm down a bit because we can actually go outside and he won't be able to wander around the front.  We are counting down the days for this!

Dylan now has an official room and no crib!  We have put him in a room with only the mattress and then we lock him in there!  It has worked pretty good and he hasn't cried too much.  One night I heard a loud crash and thought the blinds were coming down.  I ran in there and everything looked fine.  I then realized he was looking out the window.  So we snuck out side and saw Dylan standing on the window sill inside the blinds, just watching the world go bye!  When we met one of the other neighbors and told them about the Autism, they laughed and said they had seen him in the window and he looked to be posing!  They thought it was funny and I said they will probably see it much more.  As long as he is sleeping through the night, I don't care if it takes him a while to get to sleep, so other than him ruining the blinds this new arrangement has been great!

I went to my Aunts' Mom's funeral viewing tonight and her sister told me she has seen my cute kids on facebook and that she thinks I am a great Mother.  I told her I promised if she saw me at home she would think differently.  She said I am taking care of a special guy and am a special person to be given that.  I just broke down because I am struggling with this so much right now.  I know I am letting God down on the way I am handling this situation.  I know there are so many other people that would do a much better job at this then I am and I really need to get my act together.  I am not the right person for this, but because of that I am a determined person to help my son.  I know he is in there and I know we will find him.  I just need to give it time and for me to be given a WHOLE LOT OF PATIENCE!